Incorrigibly Delicious DC Delights

Incorrigibly Delicious DC Delights

     Welcome back to my little corner of chaos, ladies and gentlemen. While I don’t quite have enough to jam some DC shenaniganry down your throats just quite yet, what I do have to pile in there is even more dangerously delicious tales from the stomach. That’s right, this week is we’re going back to food reviews, my friends. While I would try to squeeze the proverbial shampoo bottle of ideas a little harder this week to lather you up with some bubbly stories from my weekend excursions, I’ve instead found that some of my more memorable experiences from this past weekend involved food… and the art of demolishing it. Therefore, I fully intend to travel once more down through the deep pits of my esophagus to regurgitate up just enough deliciousness to make you forget that I just used a vomiting metaphor to describe eating. The stories I’m about to tell you will make your mouths water, your stomachs gurgle with delight, and your loins become enflamed with such a passion for powering down some nom-noms that you might just forget your significant other in favor of a full out flavor-affair with the very delectable treats that I’m about to describe. Unfortunately I don’t have any personal pictures of what I’m about to tease you with in tantalizing detail, but what I can promise are some images courtesy of our good friend, the Google machine and his assorted inter-weblings. So sit back, shut your mouth (unless you’re eating), and get ready to slurp up some gluttonous heaven in my third DC food-scursion: “Incorrigibly Delicious DC Delights.”

Capital Q Whaaaaaaa? Go Zealot with Some Divine Inspiration with Inspire BBQ


     Here I was thinking that Capital Q could have quite possibly been the best barbecued meats this side of the Mississippi… but oh how naïve I was. Little did I know that a humble little BBQ shop down the street from the RAF would become one of my new favorite spots to jam some deeply-satisfying BBQ meats. Located right near the corner of H and 7th Streets, most people would simply pass by the barely-noticeable shop. Even when I got in the store I wasn’t sure if I was in the right place. Cakes, breads, and other freshly baked goods litter the displays… barely any mention of BBQ unless you happen to glance at the small, out of place menu over in the upper right-hand corner. But, as many a wise man has said, you can never judge a book by its cover; and this is certainly the case with Inspire.


     Now, being a voracious carnivore, pretty much anything meat will do for me (sorry vegetarians but life is just so….idk… boring without a solid hamburger every once in a while). Being an equal fan of both brisket and ribs, I took a plunge and asked the friendly staff member behind the counter to recommend something for me. Without even batting a glance he responded: “ribs.” Hmmmmm, me thinks. Could this be a tarp? The grilling (no pun intended) continues. I ask him why he thinks the ribs are a better choice than the brisket. He responds: “because we haven’t sold out of them yet today, and you gotta’ try them.” Awwww damn… supply and demand comin’ in for the ultimate K.O. There’s no way that you can tell me they sell out all the time without me aching to get some of these precious gems into my jewelry box. “I’ll take the ribs,” I says. “Good choice,” he responds. But then he did the unthinkable: he started offering me free food while I waited. Fresh-baked chocolate layer cake… oh here take a piece. You wanna’ try some of the fresh baked bread? Be my guest. I couldn’t believe my very ears and eyes. It may make me seem jaded, but it’s been a long time since I’ve thought that a food service worker legitimately cared as to whether I enjoyed not only my food, but the experience… let alone in a carry-out joint. The cook in the back even gave me extra ribs because I was a first-time customer. SCHWWWIIINNNNGG!!


     But before we get to the good part, let me preface it by saying that the employees had me taste the ribs, without BBQ sauce, before I got some sauce and headed on my way home. They insisted that I get some of the smoky goodness that was waiting for me in each rib… exactly 24 hours-worth of smoky flavor to be precise. But while they surely tasted amazing without the BBQ, it’s where the two mix that the real magic happens.


     Imagine if the sweet tangy flavor of honey BBQ met the bold flavors of spicy BBQ. Well that’s what happened, but only because I mixed the honey and spicy BBQ at the request of the store clerk. Congratulations sir, you’ve officially introduced me to a new style and flavor of BBQ that I never thought could be possible; a kind of hybrid, cyborg BBQ that not only quips like an Austrian death-machine, but can also lyricize smoother than butter on toast. To put it bluntly: it was utterly amazing. It was so good that for about ten minutes I totally forgot what Capital Q was… which is about as difficult as wrestling a boa constrictor. Capital Q: you’ve met your match. The rest of the BBQ world: you just simply can’t compete. Inspire: you’ve rocked my world. 

Washington DC : Federal Government as Founding Farmers : Food Americana


     Sometimes at work I get the distinct pleasure of experiencing something so wonderful that it literally makes the rest of my week inconsequentially easy and upbeat… not matter what the circumstances. When engaged in this kind of life-outlook, you could give me a thousand phone calls to make, ten million addresses to scour down; you could make me scrub the friggin’ floors for god’s-sake, I would do it with a big-ol’ smile on my face. Now I’m sure if any of my coworkers are reading this, they’re probably hardcore face-palming at the missed opportunity they had to basically turn me into their own personal slaves for a week. Well, Trust staff… the week after our staff lunch at Founding Farmers put me in exactly such a mood. It probably didn’t help that up until that point in the semester, I had been fiending so hard to go to Founding Farmers that I could have sworn I was going through withdrawal for a drug I hadn’t even sampled yet.

Pot Roast
     Ladies and gentlemen, Founding Farmers might be the most “quintessential DC restaurant” that I’ve been to yet. While the slightly up-scale presentation of Americana might not necessarily be anything that’s new in the culinary world, Founding Farmers does it right! Taking typical farm favorites like down-home salads, fresh hamburgers, and some of the most ridiculous looking pot roast I’ve ever laid eyes on (but unfortunately did not have the pleasure of tasting). But it’s not just the foods themselves that makes Founding Farmers so special. It’s the preparation that matters. Founding Farmers uses only the finest, wholesome ingredients available for their dishes… and it shows. Usually when I judge food, the greasier the stuff is the better. But, Founding Farmers might be one of the only cases where the quality of the ingredients literally made all the difference. It was soo good that my taste buds had to beg for mercy by the end of our lunch. Mind you, I’m not a fan of much more than meat and cheese on a burger, and I ate an entire avocado burger… lettuce, tomato, and all. It simply was that unbelievably delicious.

     Maybe I’m biased. Maybe I’ve built up founding farmers so much in my mind that I would accept nothing less than an absolute, unwavering vote of confidence and undying devotion. But alas, uninformed readers, what you may not know about Founding Farmers is that if you ever intend on eating there for a Saturday dinner, or anytime on Sunday, you require a, roughly, two-month advance reservation. That’s how popular the place is. I know I can’t personally imagine making a reservation for a simple, plain-ol Saturday night dinner two months in advance. But then again, I’ll probably only try to go to Founding Farmers at hours where getting a table isn’t like signing up for a Bronson space flight.
     Overall, Founding Farmers was an incredible experience. It could’ve been one of the closest feelings to nirvana that I’ve ever experienced. Yes, it was that good! Founding Farmers knows how to step their game up, and they’ve got the DC market cornered. Hell, they’ve been on the Food Network. You know when the Food Network chooses to feature your place that you got something good on your hands. Founding Farmers, our time together has been short, and I will probably only visit you maybe one more time… but the impact you’ve left on me will be forever untarnished. Founding Farmers: the one that got away.

Easter Dinner at the RAF… Not Quite the Traditional Experience I’m Used To

     When one typically thinks of Easter dinner, images of large hams, roasts, and a large family gathered around an old table, cherishing one of the most important holidays in the Christian faith. Our experience was not quite this, but nonetheless was just as delicious. Easter at the RAF is like when I had Thanksgiving at my apartment in Iowa City. You get all kinds of big plans for what you want to make, but somehow or another you end up compromising in some way. However, in our case, the compromise was far from being underwhelming. In fact, it might have been the best damn Easter dinner I’ve had in a long time… and it’s all thanks to our friend Tiearra.
     Easter for us consisted of going to Five Guys for lunch, only to realize that it was too beautiful of a day to be cooped indoors doing miscellaneous TWC assignments. Nay, the day demanded action; it demanded adventure; it demanded the beach? Well that’s exactly what we did… we went to the beach. The Sun was shining (for at least an hour) at the Sandy Point State Park in Maryland, about an hour away from the RAF. Thankfully, DJ Rob had us blasting and bobbing the entire way up, making the trip more of a loud concert than some meager background noise. The beach itself was fairly scenic, some solid views were accentuated by a flood of green space; all topped off with some of the clearest skies I’d seen since last summer (too bad it didn’t last too long).
     While the weather was nice for a little, a massive, hulking storm front moved in and kinda’ spoiled the full-day at the beach deal. So rather than mope about lost time, we decided that this would be a perfect opportunity to craft our own Easter feast, and by “us” I mean “Tiearra.” For quite some time she had been talking about making us some wings, and rest assured… we’re guna’ take advantage of someone wanting to make us food in our stead. So, with a quick trip to Teets, we were on our way home with a pile of fresh wings and some spices to mash up some flavors into a tasty blast of greasy delight. Now I will admit, I doubted her cooking skills. I doubted the entire event. Hell, I bought my own TGI Fridays brand wings because I didn’t think that these ones were going to be up to snuff. Oh, how I was wrong.
     After a couple hours of cooking (and by cooking I mean Tiearra cooking and us watching and playing Nazi Zombies), we were all set to mow down. This is where it was probably better that only Tiearra did the cooking. Had any of us contributed any more than simply setting the table and aiding in the cooking of easy items like Mac-N’-Cheese, we probably would have totally ruined the experience. Plus everyone loves a good compliment on their cooking, and we literally drowned T in them. They could very possibly be the absolute best home-cooked wings that I’ve had the pleasure of sampling in my short and miserable life. The combination of lemon pepper, Mrs. Dash, and a mixture of salt and pepper; paired with the ever-so-delicate frying of the wings to a crispy, golden perfection made such a mark on my taste buds that I might not be able to eat any other “generic” wing forever, or at least until my taste buds forget that awesome flavor (like that’s ever possible!). The rest of the food was good too, but it was the wings that were the star of the show, and for that we only have Tiearra to thank. My stomach is thoroughly pleased.

Musical Madness Moment

     It’s yet another week, and that means it’s time for yet another musical sampling for the week. Well, in this week’s case, one song has pretty much devoured my mind for the last couple hours (I hummed it maybe five or six times on my way home… my headphones were “broked” so I couldn’t listen to my IPod ). This week I bring to you the wondrous noises of a little band called Coheed and Cambria. I speak, of course, of “A Favor House Atlantic,” a classic in my book. Really there is no reason to not listen to it. I’m not going to try to muff up a description of a song so near and dear to me. Do yourself a favor and listen to it, then make up your own opinion about.


Image Sources:

Inspire BBQ #1:

Inspire BBQ #2:

Inspire BBQ #3:

Founding Farmers #1:

Founding Farmers #2:

Founding Farmers #3:

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